On the home front, sleep is also sucking big time, and I think we're ready to end this wonderful co-sleeping experience. I believe in it and have loved having Clementine in our bed, but know what? I love sleep more. Way more. And none of us is sleeping well with things as they are now. I was feeling guilty about kicking her out of bed (because I'm apparently twisted beyond belief), but it is totally time. Now if only we weren't so broke from Christmas that buying a bed is near impossible. Oh, and if only we weren't getting ready for holiday travels that will see us sharing beds for convenience. It just seems like there's not time to really dedicate to making this a good transition for all of us, and yet if we don't do it soon I fear the result of all this lack of sleep for all of us. Nate and I really need to sit down and talk about all this, but it's hard to find the time when we're ready to collapse at 9 because we didn't get any sleep the night before.
Clementine's vocabulary continues to expand, and I've practically lost count of all her words. In addition to those we understand, there are several that are consistently associated with things like the Christmas tree and certain toys that sound nothing like what we are calling them. We haven't had any slip-ups with her repeating our transgressions, but it is interesting to watch her mimic our behavior. She has taken to disciplining the cat, for example, and that has gone from just saying "No" and "Down" in an angry voice while pointing (do I really look like that?) to hitting Floyd. As you can see, he's ready to fight back, which has me a little more than nervous:
She's into just about everything these days, and I love to watch her attention flit from thing to thing. We let her watch a few old Christmas cartoons, but she can't just sit still and enjoy--she must multi-task by talking on the phone AND playing on her rocking horse. After about five minutes, it's just too much and she needs to take a break to play. I think if I were home with her all day, I'd be exhausted all the time.
I think it is safe to say that I officially have a new mom friend (we've had two "dates" now in rapid succession), and although I feel totally lame boasting about that, you can't imagine how nice it is to find someone who lives close to us, is easy to hang out with and who has a great kid. My friends without kids don't really understand how isolating motherhood can be, especially during week nights when I'm used to a little company, dinner out, some conversation with people to whom I am not related (not that Nate isn't the best conversationalist ever). Last night we arranged a last-minute get-together because Nate was cooking and I felt like that was something worth sharing. She and her daughter came over to play and eat and go home early for bed, and it was easy and fun. Sure, my expectations for social encounters are totally different than they were a year and a half ago, but what of it? More than artists and rockers, poets and thinkers, I need parent friends who get where I am in my life, who don't get offended if I cut their kids' meat for them or remind them to be gentle with the cat and who, in turn, will pick my kid up if she falls down or give her a great big hug for no reason. In this case, it's a little of both (good parent friend but also a cool woman who has a little of the rocker/thinker thing going on), and I'm going to stop mooning because this may sound like a creepy crush instead of just a thank-god-I'm-meeting-cool-moms-to-hang-with thing.
It's strange to be in my 30s and this obsessed with finding friends. I sound like a Middle Schooler, but I'm only a little embarrassed. There are all sorts of things they don't tell you about how your life is going to change when you have a kid, and connecting with parents is, for me, one of the harder omissions, especially since I work and don't have time during the day to cultivate that. And it's not like I'm desperate to escape the comfort of my cozy little three-person family--I love that Nate and I get tons of time with each other and our awesome little girl. I just want to make her world as big and wide as possible, and I want her to see her parents out there having a life instead of turning it all over to her. But enough justification. I also just want to be able to go to someone's house after our kids are in bed, crack open a beer and talk about all the weird shit kids do. I woke up with Clementine literally sitting on my head last night while cooing "Mama." If I don't find someone to laugh about that with I may just end up crying.
2 comments:
Ohhh! I wish you lived here (sorry- I don't wish I lived in the Motor City).
Clementine sounds like she and Ramona would be buddies. Does C. hammer kick your chest at night? That's a nice feeling.
Yeah I'm kinda getting over the co-sleeping myself!
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